People’s Choice Awards, God Save the Queen

Well, this is a weird one. Instead of having the red carpet and all the glitz, this year’s People’s Choice Awards, honoring our choices for the best in entertainment, is quite subdued. Our host, the always marvelous Queen Latifah is even subdued. Without wanting to upset the Writers Guild out on strike, they have put together an awards show without an audience and without tears. Queen Latifah is presenting all the awards this evening, and the winners accept their trophies via pre-taped messages.

You would think being hostess would help you out a little, but it doesn’t, as she lost out in the Favorite Leading Lady category to Drew Barrymore. The third nominee had been Jessica Alba. Are they sure this is People’s Choice? For Favorite Leading Man we crown Joaquin Phoenix the winner. He gives us a thank you speech on cards, muted he says, because of the writers strike.

Robin Williams does a silent treatment as well, accepting for Favorite Funny Male Star. Talking for him is Kid Rock, as they’re over in Iraq entertaining the troops with other stars. Never thought I’d see that guy go silent! He could have won Favorite Scene Stealing Star, as he usually does a pretty good job of that, but instead it surprisingly goes to Chandra Wilson of Gray’s Anatomy.

Completing a great year for herself, first a marriage, and now a People’s Choice Award for Favorite Female TV Star, is Katherine Heigl. To match this, we voted her costar Patrick Dempsey to be our Favorite Male TV Star. Dr. McDreamy thanks the writers for the success of the character. Favorite Female Movie Star Reese Witherspoon accepts her award on the set of her next movie, Four Christmases, which she stars in with Vince Vaughn. That will make his second Christmas movie in a row after Fed Claus this year!

In the Favorite Independent Movie category, there are so many great movies we could have gone with that I feel were missed. The winner is Becoming Jane, leaving me shouting what about Juno? What about Once? Our Favorite Movie Comedy we decided is Knocked Up, making this another good win for Heigl. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix was voted to be our Favorite Movie Drama, and I don’t think any Potter book or movie has ever not won something, so this is no shocker.

Accepting their award for Favorite Reality TV Competition Show, Carrie Ann Inaba and Bruno Tonioli of Dancing With the Stars wanted to especially thank the celebrities that took a chance on their show the first season, as they were being told a show about ballroom dancing wouldn’t make it. They also addressed one of their competitors in the category, American Idol, saying they don’t have a competition going between the shows, as Idol set the path, but … “we won.”

We, the people, voted our Favorite TV Comedy to be Two And a Half Men, and the guy accepting is the Half. Our Favorite New TV Comedy we decided is Samantha Who? and our Favorite New TV Drama is voted to be Moonlight, which was voted on live during the broadcast. Star Alex O’Laughlin gives his acceptance speech from some beautiful beach somewhere. Our Favorite TV Drama is House, and Hugh Laurie must be in an even better location, as he can’t be reached for an acceptance speech. We voted live for our favorite “user generated video,” in other words youtube, to be Shoes.

We voted Ellen DeGeneres as Favorite Talk Show Host and Funniest Female Star, making no surprise with either, as she ends her acceptance speech telling us she is “the walrus, coo coo kachoo. With the writers’ strike we seem to have game shows popping up all over prime time and daytime, and we have decided our favorite is Deal or No Deal. Host Howie Mandel figures the win means they’re more popular than skilled. He makes some more jokes then has to explain them to the models.

In Music categories, we have Rhianna’s Shut Up and Drive winning Favorite R&B Song. Favorite Group is won by Rascal Flatts, saying they get along well becuase they’re cousins and their moms would kick their butts if they didn’t. We voted Home by Daughtry to be our Favorite Rock Song, meaning finally the fans are showing him their support after voting him out in fourth place on American Idol. Our Favorite Hip Hop Song is Give It to Me by Timbaland, featuring Justin Timberlake and Nelly Furtado, which makes sense with those additions to the lineup. Favorite Song From a Soundtrack is You Can’t Stop the Beat from Hairspray, fitting with Queen Latifah here, yet we still get a taped bit of Nikki Blonski accepting.

There were all sorts of awards they decided not to air, most likely having to do with not being able to get the winner to pre-tape an acceptance speech, with winners such as Justin Timberlake, Gwen Stefani, Johnny Deep etc., but I have to question one of the categories. Favorite Threequel? The winner, of course, was The Pirates of the Caribbean.

While it was great to see the awards, I have to now give credit to The Golden Globes that have decided to go with no telecast at all on Sunday, instead just releasing a list of the winners. Not that I don’t like Queen Latifah, but it has to be better than sitting through two hours of her being uncomfortable and trying to make the two hours seem natural. Award shows need an audience, podium, and live reactions. Without that, we may as well have just gotten a list.