Jimmy Kimmel is Lame, It’s Too Bad Matt Damon is Married

That’s the full page add that was in Daily Variety. The saga continues. Can I just say what we’re all thinking? Sarah is a lot more funny than Jimmy. Ergo, he must be really, really good in bed. (Ew to the mental imagery.) I can’t stand his show. Would anyone care or watch this show if Sarah and Matt (and Ben) weren’t making it interesting? Since Sarah can’t really date Matt since he’s married she should dump Kimmel and date well, anyone else. How about Carrot Top? He’s way more funny. And probably better in bed.

But that’s just one opinion. Let’s hear what other’s have to say.

“I met him once, shook his hand, and he told me he once had an affair with an elderly German man who had the same earlobes as I do. It was disturbing.” – Harrison Ford Chip

“I only did that thing with him because I feared for the life of my wife and daughter.” – Ben Affleck Chip

“He hangs Peppermint Patty wrappers on the wall of his bathroom. I’m never going to his house for a ‘party’ again.” – Alyson Hannigan Chip

(A vague disclaimer is nobodies friend: Those are not real people and the celebrities with similar names did not say that stuff. )

Anywaaaays. Ever think about getting into watching the show Ugly Betty? Then you should read what Ducky wrote on Ducky Does TV. Multitasking guru that she is- she watched season one of the show on the subway! She uses the word frakkin, so I love her. Ducky, consider this my proposal, pretend there’s roses! Ah, romance.

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