Ever Just Really Disliked a Celebrity, for No Reason at All? We Feel for Ya!

First I’d just like to say that I’m supremely honored to be doing this guest spot on SofaChip. A quick shout out to Jessica (that’s what the kids say these days, right?) for letting me briefly fill her stylish-yet-oh-so-practical-shoes-with-the-foreign-name-I-can’t-pronounce. I promise not to get them dirty!

What I’ve compiled for you, dear readers, is what I now refer to as my PIDNAR list. The D is silent. Well, not overly-enunciated anyway. PIDNAR stands for People I Dislike For No Apparent Reason. I have no idea what happened to the F.

I think we as a pop culture nation spend a lot of time thinking and dreaming about our favorite stars. And in some cases tracking down home addresses from friends who work in the federal tax office. Um, not that I’ve ever done that. So while I love a good many famous people out there and I’ve spent what some might call an unhealthy amount of time obsessing over them, there are a few people that really bug me. This is where my PIDNAR list comes in. While I’m sharing personal details about my life (I’m also a Libra and enjoy putting soy sauce on everything I eat) I don’t mind sharing that list here with you today. Now, I’m not saying that I’d like to see these people on the next rocket ship to the moon, just that I dislike them and for no apparent reason. Let’s begin:

5.) Kirsten Stewart
I don’t know anything about this girl except that I dislike her. I feel that is enough.

4.) Hayden Panettiere
I believe Jessica is a fan so I hope she forgives me and understands that this is definitely not personal. Hayden Panerabread (what I tend to call her) is bright and pretty, she doesn’t spend all her nights doing whiskey shots at Prive, and by all accounts has a very solid future in acting ahead of her. So why don’t I like her? I wish I knew! She’s hasn’t done one little thing to offend me, yet here she is on my list. Maybe she’s too nice and sincere and a sarcastic, jaded girl like me doesn’t know how to deal with that.

3.) Nicole Richie
I think out of the Paris and Nicole duo most people preferred Nicole. I think most people would prefer a little case of the plague over Paris. They’re still friends I think, but Nicole has grown up and given up her bad girl ways. She’s become a mother, given up that whole anorexic thing, and has developed her own line of maternity-ware; she’s really turned her life around. So why do I really, really dislike her? I don’t know, but I dislike her more now than I ever did before. Maybe it’s because I don’t like people who give their kids three names? Or could it be that I just don’t like change and it’s hard for me when a much-loved skank becomes respectable? Oh, well. We’ll always have Paris.

2.) Milo Ventimiglia
Where to begin? He’s cute, he’s a good actor, he’s not a crack head, and he’s never, to my knowledge, slighted New Kids on The Block. So what’s not to like? I don’t know, but I don’t like him. I thought at first it was probably because I can’t pronounce his name to save my life. I’ve even had Jessica help me pronounce it and I still can’t. But there are other things I like even though I can’t pronounce their names. (Examples: Bebe clothing; the Turks and Caicos.) Well, then is it because he dated Hayden Panerabread and she’s on my list too? No, I don’t think so, I don’t discriminate by association. I just don’t like him. There is no reason.

1.) Megan Fox
Okay, this one I want on the rocket ship to the moon. I cannot stand this chick. I’ve never even seen Transformers and that other movie she was in, that Lindsey Lohan movie, Confession of a Teenage Alcoholic or whatever it was called. I’ve never seen Megan Fox act. So I can’t dislike her because of her acting skills. I haven’t seen them! Could I dislike her because she stole David Silver away from Donna? No, because that didn’t actually happen. Could I dislike her because she once cut in front of me at the DMV? No, that didn’t happen either.

But that’s totally something I think she would do! She always has this look on her face like she just stumbled into a toxic waste dump and she’s trying not to breathe in the fumes. But that’s not why I don’t like her. I think people will be quick to assume I don’t like her because she’s some overly exaggerated beauty and therefor I must be jealous but I don’t think that’s it either. I have a very pretty older sister (two actually) and a very pretty future sister-in-law, so I’m used to being the pale, homely girl.

Maybe I don’t like her because so far I haven’t seen one thing to make me like her. Not one warm and fuzzy interview, not one funny quote, not one silly and unassuming photo shoot. So maybe I DO know why I don’t like her. Because she’s so damn unlikeable! (Editor’s note: I found a totally valid reason to dislike Megan Fox)

Comments? Questions? Death threats?

- Brittany

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