Now I’ll ask you another question. Is it bad if my role model of the moment is Doctor Gregory House? If you say anything as predictable and boring as ‘yes’, then I’ll just mock you. See? I’ve ALREADY transformed! So, I cannot be stopped.

People may not always like House. They may not always respect him. But they do fear him. And that’s really much better than those first two options. That’s how you can make them do what you say! > ; )

Transcription?! Yes. Oui. Here: (make it your away message and annoy everyone!)

“Hello, sick people and their loved ones! In the interest of saving time and avoiding a lot of boring chitchat later, I’m Doctor Gregory House; you can call me “Greg.” I’m one of three doctors staffing this clinic this morning. This ray of sunshine is Doctor Lisa Cuddy. Doctor Cuddy runs this whole hospital, so unfortunately she’s much too busy to deal with you. I am a bored… certified diagnostician with a double specialty of infectious disease and nephrology. I am also the only doctor currently employed at this hospital who is forced to be here against his will. But not to worry, because for most of you, this job could be done by a monkey with a bottle of Motrin. Speaking of which, if you’re particularly annoying, you may see me reach for this: this is Vicodin.It’s mine! You can’t have any! And no, I do not have a pain management problem, I have a pain problem… but who knows? Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I’m too stoned to tell. So, who wants me?” - Dr. Gregory House

The above may be the greatest quote to define House. I vote for it as best House quote everz!

You can watch full House M.D. episodes online at Fox.com. There’s no excuse for not watching, dudes. And there’s no real excuse for me saying ‘dudes’, but roll with it.

(Okay, I’d rather have respect AND be nice. Don’t tell Dr. House.)

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Unconscious Rivals : Blair and Serena

Through random Wikipedia searching I stumbled upon the artist Lawrence Alma-Tadema. His painting entitled Unconscious Rivals reminds me of Blair and Serena of Gossip Girl. I’ve given up on the show as it doesn’t hold my interest. But that didn’t stop me from making the association. Pop culture runs in my veins, as does Diet Coke.

Blair would be the refined-looking seated girl in the mauve dress. TV Blair has better posture than this, of course. Next, take note of the way she holds her fingers to her chin - she’s clearly plotting! Evil things, no doubt. And while she’s holding hands with the other girl, it looks more like she’s ready to push her over the ledge than anything else. That other girl is our ‘Serena’ - and she looks inhibited, free-spirited, and very carefree.They’re friends, at least until the next drama arises.

The CW seems to have resorted to only wanting new shows about privileged, rich kids (see: 90210, Privileged). These unrealistic depictions show teenagers who never want for the new Coach bag, have personal trainers that also train celebs like Heidi Klum, and will never have to enlist the help of Amerisave mortgage co, or Bluefly.com since they use bags of money as throw pillows (and throw pillows themselves are actually often very expensive - I wish I wasn’t obsessed with the fluffy pillowy cutenesss that they are).

Autumn Reeser as Phoebe in Valentine - "I have cute hair, won't you watch my show?"

I did (albeit, accidentally) give Valentine another chance. Now that I’ve seen three episodes it’s grown on me the way an annoying co-worker that talks only of their cat can suddenly seem endearing.

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Beth Riesgraf as Parker in Leverage

Leverage Group Picture

TNT's Leverage

Leverage Group Picture

TNT's Leverage

Leverage

Leverage

Aldis Hodge is Alec Hardison on Leverage

It’s hard to have a favorite character because I love them all, but I have taken a real shine to Alec Hardison because he’s all about the age of geek, he knows all sorts of tech stuff, and he’s very funny. He’s the kind of guy who would probably has some of the best home theater speaker sets in every room of his place. Which, oh yea - you WILL get to see within the first two episodes, and it’s a great place. I would live there.

From Leverage - The Nigerian Job (Pilot Episode)

I will be reviewing the pilot The Nigerian Job, and will have more pictures to share with you, then!

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Madonna's arms scare me.

It’s not even Thanksgiving yet, but already I’ve seen some Christmas-themed commercials. Cue my eyes rolling. But as we can’t ignore that Christmas is coming (I don’t want to ignore that fact, I just don’t feel the need to jump the proverbial gun) this means that the inevitable concerts by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra have begun. And while 11 months out of the year you might never consider seeing these guys, in December even the most cynical of us seem to suddenly embrace all holiday music. (Note: I listen to Billy Idol’s Christmas album, thank you.)

You should consider PreferredSeat.com for Concert Tickets - whether it’s to hum along to the Trans-Siberian Orchestra or just so you can see how crazy Madonna’s arms have become. They’re a family-owned business (since 1987 - when some of you weren’t even born, haha) that remains one of the increasingly rare companies that don’t tack on extra costs aside from standard overnight shipping. They have a 200% guarantee which either means they failed math class, or they really can be trusted.

Do you think Madonna has replaced her arms with robotic arms? I wouldn’t mock her for signs of aging (if she ever gets any) - but weird bulging muscles remind me of Arnold Schwartzenegger.

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Ryan Hansen

Josh Schwartz has a web series on TheWB.com called Rockville, CA. The full list of bands for the show are as follows:

Kaiser Chiefs, Travis (yay), Anya Marina (cool name), Bishop Allen, The Broken West, Cass McCombs, Lights, Oppenheimer, The Republic Tigers (yay), The Duke Spirit, Eagles of Death Metal, Earlimart (yay), Frightened Rabbit, The Kooks (yay), The Little Ones (yay), Lykke Li, Nico Stai, Passion Pit, Phantom Planet, and White Lies.

The list of people  (probably) not playing the show are Weird Al Yankovic, Tori Amos, Jon M Queen, and Gwyneth Paltrow. And yes, Paltrow CAN indeed sing - or haven’t you ever seen the movie Duets? Psh. I suppose you don’t have the Duet soundtrack either? How can you resist the call of karaoke?

You can look forward to 20 of Rockville, CA episodes starting in 2009. Ryan Hansen from Veronica Mars is one of the cast members, which is awesome.

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Yvonne Strahovski is Sarah Walker and Zachary Levi is Chuck Bartowski on CHUCK

I randomly picked the NBC network to feature (mostly cause I was watching their Thursday night lineup when I decided to do this, so oops - the secret’s out) for this review. Let’s take a look at EVERYTHING they have to offer us TV viewers. In the big buffet of entertainment there’s no need to waste time watching the less than stellar and missing out on gold.

NBC Shows on Saturday

You’ve got Knight Rider at 8 p.m. which I would never-ever watch, and I’d recommend the same to you if you value your braincells. Later on Saturday Night Live (SNL) is on at 11:30. It always has potential to be great. For moi, deciding whether or not to tune into SNL depends greatly on the guest host and musical act. Also, I just have to say:  I miss Jimmy Fallon and Tina Fey. Sigh.

NBC Shows on Sunday

I don’t really watch any TV on Sunday.  But if you like sports or news, you’ll be happy to tune into NBC on Sundays. Otherwise, you can do something away from the TV…or, WHO am I kidding, watch one of your Netflixed movies!

NBC Shows on Monday

Okay, this is a GREAT night for TV. At 8 p.m. there’s Chuck, and at 9 p.m. there’s Heroes. Those are two amazing shows and should be watched with surround sound. At 10 p.m. there’s the Christian Slater show My Own Worst Enemy. I don’t watch this because I’m not a huge fan of action/action/action/boom! shows. If it was a movie, I’d probably give it a shot. But since it’s a TV series, I’m just not willing to get invested in it. (I hope Christian Slater will still invite me to his pool parties.)

NBC Shows on Tuesday

There’s a whole bevvy of shows I don’t watch here, like: The Biggest Loser, Law and Order: SVU

Joshua Gomez is Morgan Grimes and Julia Ling is Anna on CHUCK

NBC Shows on Wendesday

Life comes on at 8 p.m. I hear good things about it, and it’s supposed to be really all sorts of amazing. But I don’t feel like I have time to watch it…so I don’t. :X There’s also Law & Order at 9 p.m. (I’d rather watch the SVU edition than this one.)

NBC Shows on Thursday

This is the night NBC has been trying to reclaim ever since Friends and Will & Grace left the air. They’re actually (finally) doing pretty well. Starting at 8 p.m. you’ve got My Name is Earl, Kath & Kim, The Office, 30 Rock, and finally ER. I don’t watch the first or last shows I’ve listed, but the three comedies in the middle are sometimes the best part of my entire friggin’ week.

>> Kath & Kim quick review: I never saw the original Aussie series, which may be why I like this one and don’t feel like it can’t measure up to the other. It’s a great screwball comedy, and it’s full of really BRIGHT colors and nonsense served up just the way i like it. Kath and Kim are both always smiling (I bet they go to San Diego invisalign) and in turn, it makes me smile. It’s not yet an unmissable show for me, but it might become one later on. Kath and Kim are not my new BFF’s right now, but I WILL answer their calls and meet for sushi.

NBC Shows on Friday

Deal or No Deal - oh man, how is this still on air!? At 9 p.m. there’s Crusoe which I have zero interest in and haven’t even ever accidentally watched. Ten p.m. brings you Lipstick Jungle, which is yet another show I don’t watch. This is the kind of night I’d call ugly.

Aaaand, that’s your week with NBC TV!

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SofaChip: Following up 2004’s album Edible Darling, now there is the 2008 release Mouthfeel. Both are unusually great names that convey that ‘lush imagery’ you’ve said you like. What is your process for deciding upon a record title? Does it drive you bonkers to decide on a title, or does it unfold itself to you more organically?

Ben Arthur (BA): Thanks.  Titles are tricky.  The best come unbidden (like the best songs), but then sometimes you have to really work to find something that fits. I had a bitch of a time with my first novel, which just defied naming for years and went through at least three tester monikers before settling in to The Lure of the Distant Sound last week.

While there’s room for interpretation among your lyrics, you have said that you do (naturally) draw from yourself to compose them. Putting ‘yourself out there’ is a universal fear shared among many (*raises hand*). Is it ever a bit unnerving or daunting to release your albums with - not to sound dramatic - your soul rather, well, exposed?

Ben Arthur's Latest Release: Mouthfeel

BA: Part of the job.  If you don’t expose your soft chewy interior then you’re not doing it right. Art is saying something true about the amorphous and wordless reality that’s easy to know but not name (the best art tells you something you didn’t know you knew.) And like describing a dream, you feel like you’re not only powerless to do it justice, but that you are changing the dream by the very act of describing it.

What is most often the case: having lyrics that lead you to make a song, or having a tune in mind that has you thinking up lyrics to set to it? (Is this a question akin to ‘which came first, the chicken or the egg?’ By the way, which DID come first?)

BA: Depends on the song.  Sometimes a lyric comes that I want to hear in a song, sometimes a melody, and rarest of all is a lyric with a melody (which is, again, the best kind.)

I have lyric ideas and songs ideas scribbled on a million scraps of paper and little melodic riffs that I hum and think about when I’m walking around the city, sitting in the park with my daughters.  Sometimes an idea will be with you for years.  And then something clicks and it becomes a song.  Or a novel or a screenplay.

Many of your songs seem substantially serious in some way (tonally or lyrically, not always both), but if one watches you on YouTube.com it would appear that you’re actually a tremendously lively and fun kind of guy. As a musician, is it difficult to walk the line between gravity and levity? Do you ever worry about being painted as too solemn of a guy?

BA: Great. Question.  I don’t worry about being painted anything, as that’s not something worth worrying about, but I do think about the seemingly contradictory nature of what I do. I actually get a good number of people who come up after the shows and say they were surprised that I was funny, and not, I guess, some sort of pouty goth.  At the end of the day, I do have to take the art very seriously (even when goofing around) but that doesn’t mean I have to personally be a mope.

Ben Arthur - Edible Darling

And the truth is, there’s no contradiction.  If you listen to the music you find pretty much everything in there–pain, laughter, sex, love, desolation.

Hopefully the deeper you go into any artist’s work, the more you discover.  It’s the ones where everything is right there on the surface that usually disappoint (and probably, in the short term at least, succeed).

We love book suggestions, and it’s also interesting to see what kind of words (and genres) a songwriter surrounds themself with in spare moments. So, what kind of books do you read (and/or, what are some of your favorites)?

BA: Most recently finished Pictures at a Revolution by Mark Harris, a history of film in the late 60’s, which was fascinating.  On the novel side, Suite Francaise by Irene Nemirovsky is breathtaking, and then a book by a neighbor with whom I did a reading recently, Homegirl, by Judith Matloff, is very funny.

Speaking of books, you actually recently wrote a book! Tell us something about it?

I think I mentioned the new title already… It’s a story about a middle-aged television producer who gets caught cheating on his wife and tries to weasel out of it.

Wait - I’m not done talking about the book. How did you decide that you wanted to write a book? That’s a pretty big undertaking.

BA: Not really. There’s a lot of downtime, both business-wise and artistically, and it helps to have a lot of projects up in the air at the same time, so that when you hit a wall with one thing you can turn to another.  Actually I just finished my fourth novel, which I’ll be releasing along with my new studio album in 2010.  It’s a concept novel/concept album, where there are songs that track themes from the book, and also ‘artifacts’, songs that the characters themselves hear during the course of the story.  Most of the latter will be sung by other artists.

Where are you, and what are you currently up to? (Don’t: tell us if involves mafia crime. Do: mention touring and where people can next see you play!)

BA: I’m back home in NYC and will stay here through the winter months, but will be back on the road in the spring, when I’ll release both my fifth album (a live album tentatively titled Roadkill) and my first novel.  I’m looking right now at a southern leg starting in February, through TN, GA, SC, NC and VA, and then a northeast jaunt during April/May.  Then, as I do every year, I’ll do a European tour in the fall.

www.benarthur.com / Ben Arthur on MySpace / Ben Arthur on Last.fm /Purchase Ben Arthur CDs on CD Baby.

To add a finishing note, I find writing about music to be terribly difficult for myself. As much as I love music, the territory of notes and chords is foreign to someone who couldn’t even master playing the fluteophone in 4th grade (I faked it the entire time). But I do know the points to hit upon to give you a good idea of the music. For instance - genre. You’d like to know the genre, yes? To my ear, it’s Indie, Folk, Pop and Acoustic. Next! Namedropping is maybe kind of an annoying cheat, but I’m not stopping that trend. And I’m going to go an extra step.

You’d very possibly like Arthur if you like artists such as: Lisa Loeb, Regina Spektor, Howie Day, John Mayer, Sarah Harmer, Josh Kelley, Matt Nathanson, Sara Bareilles, KT Tunstall, Pete Yorn, Fiona Apple, A Fine Frenzy, Patty Griffin, Jude, or The Counting Crows. To finish off the business of namedropping, let me add that Rachael Yamagata does a duet called ‘Sun Also Rises‘ with him on Mouthfeel, the guys from Dave Matthews Band appear to be fans, and Ben Arthur’s opened shows for gifted people like Shawn Colvin and Tori Amos. Bottom line? I’m a really big fan, so listen already. (Especially to the song ‘Keep Me Around’ - my favorite track on Edible Darling.)

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Felicia Day plays Codex in The Guild

I’ve finally discovered The Guild, and I never want to go back to a reality without it. Felicia Day (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog) created The Guild, and also writes and acts for it. Joining her in the cast is Vincent Caso as Bladezz, Jeff Lewis as Vork, Amy Okuda as Tinkerballa, Sandeep Parikh as Zaboo and Robin Thorsen as Clara. Every person in this cast is delightful to watch, although I do have a soft-spot for Codex (Day) and her neutrotically charming behavior that may or may not be something I can personally relate to. Ahem.

I was reading something, somewhere (as I often do - but I’m trying to stop this bad habit, I swear it!) about how there aren’t enough funny females on TV aside from the notable Tina Fey. First off, they’re wrong. There ARE some others. Regardless! This is why The Guild must go on to be on TV.  Felicia Day has wonderful comedic instincts and she reminds me greatly of Fey. Maybe one day Tina Fey will go do lunch with a one Ms. Felicia Day and they can become BFF’s. (Paris Hilton can’t be the only one searching for a BFF, right?) Their last names rhyme (Fey/Day), so how could it get more perfect than that? In fact, I can see a Fey/Day duo talkshow in the works…

Summing up why you should watch The Guild, in just a few words: It’s. Better. Than. Most. Stuff. On. TV.

Start with the first episode. The best way to give this is a try is just start watching. And look, here is that first episode! Voila:

You can watch all of the ten crazyily-awesome episodes at YouTube.com. You can also catch the gang on MySpace.

Season one of The Guild is on sale at WatchTheGuild.com. It includes interviews with the cast, gag reels, two commentary tracks, and more. Season two is hopefully going to be ready for viewing soon.

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Lauren Graham ponders my answers.

Where is your mobile phone? Abandoned
Where is your significant other? MIA
Your hair colour? Chocolate
Your mother? Tsk-tsk
Your father? Amazing
Your favourite thing? Lake
Your dream last night? Oblivion
Your dream goal? Well-being
The room you’re in? Calm
Your hobby? Self-Preservation
Your fear? Life
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Farther
Where were you last night? Fiction
What you’re not? Virtuoso
One of your wish-list items? Art
Where you grew up? Americana
The last thing you did? Moisturize
What are you wearing? Hotpants ;p
Your TV? Constant
Your pets? Darling
Your computer? Demented
Your mood? Longing
Missing someone? Denial
Your car? Batmobile
Something you’re not wearing? Bling
Favourite shop? Etsy.com
Your summer? Uneventful
Love someone? Impossible
Your favourite colour? Burgundy
When is the last time you laughed? Phone
When is the last time you cried? Eons

What I’m listening to: Martina Sorbora - Cure for Bad Deeds / MySpace

What I’m eager to watch tonight: Heroes, Chuck and How I Met Your Mother (new episodes for all). Check TVguide.com to see what you like.

In media news, mark your calendars for Ellen’s Even Bigger Really Big Show on Saturday, November 29th. It’s a variety show for TBS with host-extraordinaire Ellen DeGeneres. Ellen will be performing, as well as introducing acts from all over the globe that she’s hand-picked for us (isn’t that sweet). Check out thecomedyfestival.com for more.

“We decided to bring the show back to Vegas because the first act we booked is a ‘brother-sister pole act,’” said DeGeneres.  “Apparently Vegas is the only place where you can get away with something like that.”

Make sure you guys check out my interview with The Closer Costume Designer, Greg LaVoi!

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Fans of The Closer know that Brenda’s favorite color is definitely pink. What are your personal favorite colors to wear, work with, and be surrounded by?

Greg LaVoi (GL): I was taught by a producer, and of course by the example of costume designer Edith Head, that the designer should not out-peacock the star, thus my work wardrobe is black shirts, pants or suits in the fall and winter, and crisp white shirts and khakis in the summer. I love to work with pastels on a film set. Usually the sets try and be the star of the show, but in addition to large walls and furniture, you have actors that must be dressed. Pastels work well on lots of skin types, for both men and women. I try and avoid black on camera as it just soaks up the light. I surround myself with neutral walls and floors to then explode color on the walls and furnishings…or keep it all monochromatic, whatever my mood might be. Nothing sets off art or objects like white or cream walls.

From The Closer episode Problem Child

Through your Fashion File blog I know you have several favorite pieces (like the ‘not a trench coat, trench coat’) that you’ve dressed Kyra Sedgwick in for The Closer. Are there ever times when you can’t decide between a couple different outfits for one particular scene on the show? What helps you decide which outfit components will go back to the rack and which will be worn on screen? (Can this advice translate to real world style-editing for those of us who stand far too long in front of a mirror with three different blouse options? And yes, I’m sadly guilty of this!)

GL: When choosing costumes for Brenda or other actors the script totally dictates what I pick. I start with the script, make costume sketches in the margins and then go to Brenda’s closet and already have a notion of what I want the mood of her clothes to portray and to move the story along. Often, if I have a couple of great choices for her and have to narrow it down the script and story helps me make my final decision. Translating this practice to real life, my actors have the luxury of me choosing their looks from head to toe, but for the real gal or guy out there, get dressed putting on everything you think you need for that outfit. Then look in a full length mirror, squint and then remove one item or accessory to lighten the image and walk out the door confident!

You use lots of wonderful vintage pieces on the show. Have you grown up being a fan of vintage clothing, or did you evolve into that love?

GL: Growing up in the 1960’s my dad owned a mens and boys clothing store, and my mom was a real fashion plate so I loved watching the two of them dress and wear great clothes. There was a civility to that era that got lost in the 1970’s when people relaxed and lost their manners and breeding. By using vintage on the screen and in my daily life I help show girls today that you can still dress like a lady and function in a man’s world. I hope I am educating the masses that good construction and design never goes out of style, and vintage is the best place to learn how really fine clothes were meant to be made and worn.

Have you always wanted to work with fashion? Who are some of your style icons and inspirations?

GL: I acted as a child and wanted to pursue acting as a career, that is perhaps why all the actors I work with really understand that I “get” character, and appreciate where I take them via their costumes. However, when I took one look at those Bob Mackie costumes on Sonny and Cher, I knew that I wanted to devote my life to costume design. I always sketched fashion, even as a child - partly due to the great fashion sketches that I saw in my dad’s stores advertising, and also seeing what my mom would bring home from her shopping sprees in the city. My style icons would be: Barbie - of course, Jackie Kennedy, Doris Day, Princess Diana, Gene Kelly, Sean Connery as James Bond and Brad Pitt.

We won’t ask you to name names, but do you ever see people in young Hollywood that you wish you could pull aside and style differently (or at least yank their dress down about five inches)? Can you name some of the people you think are getting it right on a consistent basis?

GL: Lindsey Lohan gets my pick for one of the young Hollywood types that gets it wrong a lot of the time. When she’s styled for an event or fashion shoot she looks great, but out and about in Hollywood and caught by the paparazzi she just looks unkempt and messy. Britney was on my get it wrong list last year but she’s cleaned up her act and looks fresh and fashionable - most of the time. I think Christina Aguilera gets it right a lot of the time, always pulled together and looking like a star as she is. I love it when someone in the public eye cares how they look when they go out their front door. Get rid of the sweat suits and grunge looks now, please!

From The Closer episode Controlled Burn

Do you watch Project Runway? If so, as a veteran of the fashion industry, what do you think of it?

GL: Love Project Runway, except this season. I thought the designers were second rate and not at all talented. The Bryant Park show was better than the whole season, and Leanne’s work was beautiful, but overall the past seasons have showcased more talent than this year. Jay, Santino, Daniel, Jeffery, Christian, and even Wendy Pepper for the sheer evil, were all fun to watch and gave us unexpected design. If you look carefully at Michael Kors last season and this season’s collections I think he must be a fan of The Closer and Brenda Leigh Johnson as several of his silhouettes and designs are almost direct copies of styles I have put her in - with a vintage vibe of course!

(Editors note: I agree about the show significantly lacking lately! I did love Leanne’s work, though. She was the clear winner, almost from the start.)

Even people who love their jobs can feel burnt out from their passion. Is every day a good shopping day, or are there ever days when you don’t want to shop at all, and the very idea of going through a clothing catalog makes your head hurt?

GL: Every day is a good shopping day. I love my job and 99% of that is due to Miss Kyra Sedgwick, the other 1% is the support I get from my producers and directors. They allow me to really be creative and do my job. The only time shopping, cataloging or eBaying makes my head hurt is when an item I covet is too expensive for our shows budget, on backorder, or I’m outbid!!!

From The Closer episode Time Bomb

My first word was ‘doll’ so you’d better believe I love your Barbie Loves L.A. book (Barbie Loves L.A.: America’s Favorite Doll Sees the Sites). Can you tell us a bit about what we can expect from your upcoming book, Barbie Loves Rt. 66?

GL: Since Barbie Loves L.A. was so well received and is now being launched this Christmas in Paperback, when time permits I have been shooting Barbie Loves Rt. 66. I have already shot in California and Arizona, and parts of New Mexico, but I plan to rent a Barbie Bus and travel the entire Rt. 66 in a two week period form LA to Chicago and back. I had hoped to have it ready by now, but thank god I’m busy on The Closer and am only able to shoot during our hiatus.

—

Are you guys amped to go find some vintage fashion now? I am - possibly something with tiny black and white polka dots.  One of my favorite things to do is to use a glamorous vintage broach (I have some lovely ones thanks to my Grandmother) and affix it to a simple cardigan (which can be from anywhere, even The Gap).

Make sure to check out Brenda’s Corner: Fashion File with Greg LaVoi on TNT.com. The pictures are from TNT.com. Many thanks go to Greg LaVoi for letting me pick at his brilliant brain!

The Closer - The Complete First Two Seasons

The Closer: The Complete Seasons 1-3

The Lucky Guide to Mastering Any Style: How to Wear Iconic Looks and Make Them Your Own

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